I don’t know what I’m doing…

Inasmuch as we’re the authors of our own lives, I am starting a new chapter in mine. Yesterday evening I realised  that not knowing what I’m doing is a blessing, not a handicap. Of course I don’t know what I’m doing!  If I did the chapter would already be over.

A new chapter for me now seems about being alive in a different way. I am choosing and refining some fresh priorities on which to base what I do, and how I do it. This could keep me busy for a while….

What I’m aiming at can be summed up in a couple of lines from a recent song…
‘If its not love, then I’m letting it go;
but if it is, fill me to the brim.’


my grandfather George, his mother, his brother John, and their donkey Mercury

This photo was reputedly taken in 1890. I wonder where it was taken. The donkey and cart, location and picnic basket suggest one thing, but the three people, particularly the mother, look dressed for church or some such.

Such different times…some 24 years before the First World War. Perhaps at that time, one looked ones most chipper at all times, even for a country picnic….keeping up appearances, stiff upper….

I like to think of what simple pleasures they valued and enjoyed back then. What fun to hitch a donkey to a cart, and with a hamper of prepared food and drink, make your way with two companions to a likely spot to enjoy the great outside. There you could eat and drink, talk, sing, play some games, take a nap…

I recently saw a family picnicking in a city park. One child was absorbed in an iPad, the other was playing a game on his father’s phone. Mother was speaking on hers. Only the father seemed aware of his surroundings, gazing idly at the birds, trees and sky….

How deeply distracted we have allowed ourselves to become. We have all, to some extent, become reliant on these extraordinary devices. Surely we would be well advised to severely limit our time on them, treating them as the tools they are, and re-engage more effectively with the world around us, the world to which we really are, physically and spiritually, connected.